Again.. Why Do I keep Doing This…

Hello World…. It’s me again… The self-proclaimed, “Laosy Guy”…  I always end up losing myself and rediscovering myself. This is one of those time where I have neglected to really stay consistent to my core principles.

Millions of thoughts have entered and left my body. I recall telling myself that I would do a better job at keeping current with life by posting the meaningful moments of my life. And I of course, I always seem to fail myself. An occurrence that happens too often. :)

As I reflect back at my goals for 2012, I have a sense of celebration. I have made some significant movements on many of the goals I have listed. I am very happy things are moving forward.

I am unhappy how I have lost focus and have been distracted in many ways. I can’t get back the time and re-do what I should have done. I now have to adjust my current stage and make it happen. As I am writing this, I am listening to one of my favorite bands, Coldplay;  a song that sums up this post, “The Scientist.”

We can’t bring back the past, the minutes we lose, the opportunities that escaped, the decisions we wish we can reset… life does not work in that fashion. What it gives you is a valuable lesson on how to live daily and for me, it has taught me to live into my core principles.

I know 100% that I have failed myself by making decisions that hold me back in the long term aspect of life. In the short term, the decision gave me a tremendous lift in joy and help me create a reality where I thought I was doing the right thing. It was a false reality.

How often do we fool ourselves and believe we are doing what is right at the moment?

I do it every day. I could have been running 5 miles today but no… I tell myself that I am too busy. I could have written a grant proposal today but no… I tell myself it’s the weekend and I should enjoy it and not work.

In my life, I hinder my success more than I want to except. The last few months I have been telling myself to post more. Have I listened to myself? NOT AT ALL!

I struggle to stay consistent. How much can I achieve if I can be more disciplined?

This is the question I will answer and come to terms with. All I know is that I have to fight through my laziness and my WANT to live in the moment. Maybe a beer at this time is not a good idea when have a project to finish or when I have to present a case story the next day.

Can anyone of you relate to what I am going through? If you can, are you able to provide any suggestions on how I can stay disciplined?

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